How to inculcate the habit of self study in children!
Many of you want to know how my boys study on their own. So here is a bit though not everything in detail.
1. I had to make up my mind to let go. Since I am a control freak I love to be aware of everything they did. I had to tell myself to let go. Letting go early is v important for their development.
So you need to let go the need to hover in your child’s head all the time.
2. My mom was v happy when she saw my sons studying, eating, playing and fighting on their own. She said a v important thing. “When you were all young, I had no time nor did I know what to teach you all. So I would sit with you all. But that worked well with you as you learnt to study on your own. I see parents who sit and teach 2 to 3 hours daily but the kids are not at all serious.”
So the message is to let your kids study on their own. They will make mistakes and they will falter. It’s ok. Let them do these mistakes when young. The stakes are low. The loss is small. So what they get less marks in class 2 or 5 or 7! Let them realize what is failure early on. They will understand how to do self study. And trust me, in this age of internet, the only reason I am sending my kids to school is because I want them to mingle around with 20 other kids and teachers. Socialize with them . Of course I need peace too.
3. I do not ever ask them what marks they have got. All I ask before assessment is a quick answer to my questions on how will you use this concept in real life. If they know great. Else I give them a bit of Gyan that is enough.
After they come back from tests I don’t ask how much will they get. I ask them this ” So were the questions easy or tough?” If they say it was easy, I know they have understood everything v clearly. If they say it was tough, I know I need to explain it to them as they still have not understood the usage of what ever they learnt and hence it seemed tough to them. It also tells me that I did not explain to them good enough for their smarty heads. So I have to simplify the explanations.